Sunday must have been exhausting for you, maybe even upsetting. A new town, new faces and a an ominous order from a man without a face... who wouldn't be a little frightened? Hopefully, all of that is forgotten when you climb out from under your blankets this fine Monday. Rise and shine! A new morning is a new start!
If you make your way to the lounge, you will find a few copies of the local newspaper provided for your perusal. Once you go outdoors, you'll find the weather forecast 100% accurate. It's pretty impressive.
It seems that quiet mornings like this are going to be your everyday life now. Maybe you should see this whole stay as a vacation? Go out and explore the town, meet your fellow motel guests and meet the townspeople. They're sure to welcome you with a smile!
This week's special in the diner is lemon pie made with love (and a top-secret recipe)
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cartesianism2018-09-30 10:28 pm
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It wouldn’t hurt you to make one or two more.
[Anything that could help anchor Oda; support him.]
I could introduce you to some people.
[See? He’s fine.]
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[ ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
he's just a little afraid of change, okay. ]
I like how it is now. You and I, here. If I somehow make a friend, then it'll happen-- I don't wanna force it.
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...I can’t really be upset when you say it like that.
[Since when did he let himself have so many weaknesses?]
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[ oda knows that he doesn't make it any easier for dazai-- he's thankful that dazai would even think about dealing with the likes of him. ]
Have you met anyone interesting?
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[Can you just see the sparkles in his eyes?]
I found the one. Well— she hasn’t agreed yet but... she agreed that if she ever changed her mind, she’d come to me first!
[Oh god. This isn’t... yes it is.]
The girl of my dreams... the one that may leave this world with me!
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[ oda isn't...too surprised. or at least, he feels like he shouldn't be. this is dazai, after all, who's obsessed with suicide. for someone with such a warped view on life and death, oda feels that he shouldn't be surprised that he'd think of this as romantic.
but he still feels a tinge of...something unpleasant. ]
Well, as long as the two of you are happy. [ and he'll down the glass. ]
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What he says next is— very hushed.]
...more than ever, I’m afraid of each new day. I’m not someone who can sit and wait for the things I cherish to be taken from me.
[Happiness... is probably forever beyond him.]
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[ those words hurt oda as if dazai himself was driving a knife through his heart. of course... he has part of the fault in his unhappiness. and there's nothing that can be done about that anymore.
clearly guilty, oda looks down at his now empty drink. ]
Yeah.
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Dazai looks down at Oda’s empty glass and suddenly it hits him.
He takes out the card that had been given to him and slapped it down on the counter with a grin.]
Two more glasses please. Tonight’s tab is mine.
[Whatever is on his mind now, chances are it’s a terrible idea. But making terrible choices is one of the things he’s truly good at.]
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[ the bartender brings them two more glasses as asked, and it's hard for oda not to huff in amusement, despite the guilt that continues to make his chest ache.
he takes one glass, but doesn't drink from it yet. ]
I can't think of anything to toast for.
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To working together again.
[That's fine enough for now, right? Besides. The night is far from over. It'll only go downhill from here.]
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he takes the second drink, raising the glass in a toast. ]
To working together again. [ even in a strange town like this, despite their circumstances. maybe the time apart hasnt changed them that much. and if they have changed, then hopefully for the better. ]
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They're both probably taking these drinks a little fast but it's fine. They don't have anywhere to be. No meetings to be ready for; no missions to get thrown on them. It's almost too normal for them.
But then... it also allows for moments like this where they're probably about to make some mistakes.]
Ahh-- It's really not a bad taste once you get used to it.
[Oh boy.]
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[ oda can definitely feel the buzz of the alcohol already, but it's not unpleasant-- quite the opposite, actually. there's nothing better than to be with a good friend and have a glass of whiskey in his hand.
maybe they'll regret it later...but for now, it doesn't matter. he drinks, letting the alcohol burn on its way down. ]
Maybe this isn't so bad, if we can be like this.
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[There is something almost desperate about the way he forces that cheerful tone over the top. It’s almost too good to hear that from Oda.
Part way through that first drink he knew he’d have regrets. Everything after was just him accepting this bad decision with open arms.]
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it’s impossible. oda knows that he’s not strong enough to leave dazai.
he downs his second drink, and immediately goes for the third. the buzz is pleasant, and calms his inner turmoil. ]
You... I meant it. I’m proud of you, Dazai. I really mean it.
CW: hints of suicidal thinking
He takes another drink down with one gulp to prepare him for what comes next. It leaves him feeling the burn and the sting; but it makes the words easier to get out, while simultaneously stirring up the complicated feelings in his gut.]
Mmm. It wasn’t easy. Years of waiting... and somehow I survived to see it— the day when I finally kept my promise.
[There was something for him to be truly happy to live for at one time... huh.]
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but... if he doesn’t do it now... then when? ]
What will you do if you get out of here alive?
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[It’s more than a possibility but— well it doesn’t require a lot of thought, surprisingly.]
I’ll return to the Armed Detective Agency. I’m sure Kunikida-kun is yelling about how I’ve messed up his plans again. Though I doubt they’ll come looking for me. Atsushi-kun might ask but—
[There is this smile that just barely shows. It’s small, when he’s not talking or joking— but it’s real, even with it’s hints of sadness lingering... there’s a small happiness buried in that darkness.]
....
[Even now he hesitates to add this inquiry. But—]
And...? What will you do?