Sunday must have been exhausting for you, maybe even upsetting. A new town, new faces and a an ominous order from a man without a face... who wouldn't be a little frightened? Hopefully, all of that is forgotten when you climb out from under your blankets this fine Monday. Rise and shine! A new morning is a new start!
If you make your way to the lounge, you will find a few copies of the local newspaper provided for your perusal. Once you go outdoors, you'll find the weather forecast 100% accurate. It's pretty impressive.
It seems that quiet mornings like this are going to be your everyday life now. Maybe you should see this whole stay as a vacation? Go out and explore the town, meet your fellow motel guests and meet the townspeople. They're sure to welcome you with a smile!
This week's special in the diner is lemon pie made with love (and a top-secret recipe)
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cartesio) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
cartesianism2018-09-30 10:28 pm
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[ She smiles helplessly, not sure how much of this story she wants to tell to this random kids. At this point a lot of other visitors know the rough details of what went down because Cian finds herself confronted with it at every corner... Weird how the floodgates just open after you say it once, even if you've kept it inside for 13 years before. ]
It wasn't a bad decision and I'd do it again. [ Because Tuan has thanked her, because Tuan is glad she's still alive - she can't disrespect Tuan in such a way, she can't even hypothetically undo her friends last 13 years. Those are Tuan's and Tuan's alone. ]
But it made me realize that I can't escape my society no matter what I do. Considering it too deeply just makes it suffocating, it's better to stop.
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So you gave up.
[Matter of fact, more so than it is judgmental. In a way, he's almost reminded of the last thing he said to Allura about her father, and that -- that makes him change course immediately.]
Well you've finally escaped it now so I guess you must be thrilled to be here.
[Joy.]
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'Escape' is a pretty word for being brought without any contribution of my own.
[ Nevermind that being excited about this place would be rather heartless. ]
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How much do you want to go back. Really.
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I hadn't thought about it. [ Tuan is still in their world, Cian is pretty sure of that now. She doesn't want to leave her behind, least of all when Miach is concerned... but that doesn't really matter because... ]
I think someone very important from my world might want me to be here and I owe it to her.
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What's that supposed to mean?
[Evidently he's curious enough that he stops eating nachos to give her his full attention.]
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I don't get it though. I've asked people here about her, by name, by description... Nobody has met her. Why would Miach do this to any of you?
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It's obviously not your friend who's responsible!
[It's snapped at her, harsh, cutting.]
Do you really think everything revolves around you and your broken promises? Just how important do you think you are?!
1/2
She draws herself back against the backrest of her seat, accidentally knocking over her glass of water.
How important do you think you are?
She's very important. She's a precious resource. Her life is needed by mankind. Her body isn't her own, that is how important she is. Every move she makes is for the people she is so precious to---
--- She isn't important at all. Her life, her death, those are only her own, because she doesn't matter. Nobody should care about her, there is no reason to. There is only Cian and she isn't important in the slightest.
She can't speak. There is no way she can answer this question. Her mouth just hangs open uselessly as she stares at Keith in shock. ]
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Miach can do anything.
Miach brought her here.
She can make it up to Miach.
Are you watching, Miach? Are you seeing my weakness? I'm sorry, Miach. I'm so so sorry.
Tears well up in Cian's eyes, partly shock and partly a deep-seated sorrow that's been eating at her core for so long. There is moisture everywhere. The drip-drop of the spilled water from the table onto her skirt. The tears that pool and start to spill without her permission.
But she really has to smile. Interface properly. It's all she's good at. All she can do. ]
I don't matter at all, I know that. I'm only me, that's why...
[ ... that's why she can't think of anyone or anything else. ]
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His friends that he yelled at in much the same fashion. Do you really think we're some chosen saviors?! What are we DOING here?! He'd screamed venom at them, all of them, knowing it'd hurt, knowing damn well that he was supposed to be their leader. The person everyone could count on. The one who was supposed to be holding them together in difficult times. Not kicking sand in their eyes, not slashing gaping wounds in their morale.
Keith grits his teeth, both hands now clenched into tight fists. What the hell is he doing now? Eating food, sitting down leisurely at a diner while the others back home are starving to death or frozen indefinitely in lions that aren't fucking working anymore. And what the hell can he still do for them even if he manages to make it back? They all hate him by now and he can't fucking blame them for it. Any of it.
And from the looks of it, he hasn't learned a fucking thing. Yelling at an unrelated girl who's never had to really think for herself or defend herself. Scaring her into tears as she just sits there letting the spilled water drip onto her lap. Shame burns his insides -- he should be better than this.
But in the end? He just isn't.
Keith tosses his napkin at her, still fuming still furious.]
You-! Stop smiling if you're upset.
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Doing that is nice, it keeps her hands busy and provides a flimsy excuse to simply not reply to Keith just yet. She only looks back up at him when the flood is under control - and she's still smiling faintly. ]
That's not how things are done. It's silly to still play by the rules now, I know, but... I don't want to place the burden of my feelings on someone unwilling.
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He needs to get the hell out of the diner. He has to go somewhere less stifling, less oppressive, less fucking normal -- and that's when Cian finds her voice again.]
The hell is that supposed to mean?! You think I can't see that I'm making you cry if you put a fake smile on it?! You're making me and everyone else here deal with your feelings whether they want to or not!
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[ There's no aggression in this statement. It is simply what comes to mind first and foremost for Cian, in a fit of bewilderment. Keith doesn't have to care. He's not from a world that forces him to feel responsible for every stranger's most minuscule issues. Cian's problems are not even a matter of life and death - it's just badly concealed tears shed for herself, selfishly.
Keith doesn't need to care at all. Cian expected he wouldn't. He's like Tuan after all, Cian had thought, but unlike Tuan he's not her friend. Keith doesn't have a reason to care if he's making anybody cry. Nobody is making him.
Which means Keith just cares because caring is somehow intrinsic to him. Because he somehow was born a person who cares, just like that. Funny how that works.
Cian gets up from her seat. Whatever the reason for Keith's strange behavior is, it's clear he doesn't want to put up with her - and if she's honest, that feeling is mutual. Intentionally or not, Keith is tearing searing holes into her chest after all. ]
Have a nice meal.
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No-. [Still forceful, but no longer shouting, Keith grits his teeth and gets to his own feet.] You stay. I.. I need to get out of here. I'll pay for the food on the way out.
[And before she can really object any further, he's already walking towards the cashier.]