The peaceful times are over. Moloch von Zinzer was murdered, and Nine was sentenced as his murderer. Everyone in Cartesio knows that.
Although life goes on, it seems the town of Cartesio isn't going to forget the tourists' transgressions. Not only they commited larceny in the cinema, they also murdered and executed in their town! It's no surprise their hospitality towards the visitors has cooled down considerably.
Not only they're maintaining a tense cordiality with them, they also have started talking behind the visitors' backs. All kinds of rumors are starting to sprout, yet nobody seems to be willing to say it to the tourists' faces. Talking directly to most passerby makes them distrustful, and nobody seems to want to be in close quarters alone with them.
It's only matter of time before the relationship between tourists and Cartesio starts degrading even further.
In the lobby of the motel there's a few more brochures, and
the maps have been updated once again.
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cartesianism2018-10-14 10:52 am
open + building investigation
He waits for Oda after, when it's done.
But later he goes to abandoned building #2 to investigate just what this space may have been used for. So let's see if he can get inside, shall we?
In the evening he visits the ice cream parlor. Well... this is a nice way to cope. It's sweet, after a whole lot to be bitter about.]
post execution
but maybe dazai can tell how much just one kill wore him down. he doesn't know what to say at this moment, because-- what is the right thing to say? how should they act? ]
Got anything planned for today?
[ oda decides to ignore the elephant in the room for now. and he hopes that dazai won't bring it up either, just for the sake of making things less tense. ]
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[Because let's be honest. He's more worried about you than he is about himself. But no, he won't drag you into that conversation. He knows that Oda knows well enough what he has to say. So--!! Better things.]
It looks like there are some new buildings on the map today.
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[ eat lunch, smoke a cigarette or seven, and exist.
that said, he tilts his head when dazai mentions the new places ]
Really? What buildings?
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Hmm, well-- a break is important every now and then.
[He'll support your choices, as long as you take care of yourself.]
There's a few, including some abandoned buildings. But there's also a graveyard, a church and an ice cream parlor.
[Here, let him show you!]
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[ well, oda's not one for sweets, but he doesn't doubt that dazai will probably drag him there one day. and, if they don't hate him, maybe he can also take sakura or millium there, too. ]
You're gonna investigate the abandoned building?
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[He'll be making sure you get out, you sure bet he will.]
I thought it might be fun. There might be something useful there at least. I'll let you know later what I find.
Investigation
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There's a few wire hangers on the floor, though. That seems to be the only item around here.
A bare door leads into another part of this store. It doesn't seem like it's locked, in fact, it's ajar]
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...sorry former store owners, he's going to step up on his tip-toes and grab down one of the unmarked boxes so that he can open it up and see what's inside! What kind of merchandise do we have here?]
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...
...it's clothing. Lots of clothing of all types, of all sizes too. Well that was anticlimactic.
On the other hand, looks like you have stumbled onto an abandoned clothing store. What's more, there's a ton of merchandise in here, and nobody in Cartesio's going to miss it.
May as well make lemonade with your lemons, eh? Some people who need better civilian clothes sure will be grateful.
Abandoned Building #2: Exploration Complete]
ice cream parlor
She doesn't get a ton, for once – her appetite's just not in it. But she does get a nice cone of mint chocolate chip.
Mimicking what she'd done for Oda at lunchtime, she just plops down beside Dazai without a word, licking at her ice cream.
She does raise her off hand in a slight wave. That counts as a greeting, right?]
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Hello Milly-chan.
[No one, not even Dazai, is here to pretend this is anything remotely like a good day.]
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[She pauses to take an actual bite of her ice cream before speaking up again.]
I'm kinda surprised I haven't seen you with Oda today. You looked even more upset yesterday than he did.
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...no. I think what he needs the most right now are the affirmations of others. I have the utmost faith in Odasaku.
[Not that he isn't worrying about him in his own way. But he does believe that what Oda needs now is support from the others.]
Not that I'm entirely happy that he put himself in that position in the first place.
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[Another bite, thoughtfully.]
'Cause I'm not, but I kinda understand where you're coming from. Just 'cause it was better him or Kino than Clarisse or Sarge doesn't mean having him do it was good.
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[He stabs his spoon into his cherry ice cream and sighs.]
By doing things like this, I'm sure he thinks that he can confirm the type of person he thinks he is.
...yet his motivations in doing them point to a true character that he's lost sight of himself.
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[She frowns, raising one leg up onto the seat in front of her and wrapping her arm around it to draw it to her chest.]
Man... do you have any idea how hard it is to keep going "forward, relentlessly" when everyone in this town keeps reminding you of the guy who told you to go on without him?
[And then turns around and does stupid things like dying, just like he did? Nom, nom, frustration, nom.]
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But then... as far as he was concerned... he didn't need any of that, where he was going.
Keep in mind, all of this happened before he came here.
[Dazai shifts the ice cream around, but he just continues to stare at it-- like he's seeing something else.]
...he is moving forward now. It's weak and clumbsy as attempts go, but he's doing it all the same. But he's still not sure that he can keep living this way, if he re-opens his old wounds. Even I don't know what he'll do at that time if he does.
Yet Oda is a man without ulterior motive. He's very simple, in that regard. What he says is the truth, at least the way he sees it. And though he can't see it, there's much more to him than his dark past.
we're probably walking right into spoilers and massive content warnings
...I don't have any reason not to believe in him. Even after this. I know he just did it to make it quick... the only people I can hate for it are the Sarge and Nine.
'Sides. It's not like he's the only person I know who's done bad things. And we all believed he could get better, too...
[And that's where Millium goes quiet, her sadness from after the trial washing over her again although thankfully, her tears are spent on this for now.]
...Dazai. He said something to me, when we were talking at the diner. That "life is important." Do you think so, too? ...Does that mean you guys feel like this every time someone dies?
straight into dazai's cw: suicidal ideation zone
[What Oda had done, he'd done with his heart on his sleeve, even if he was blind to it's greater meaning. But if the people that Oda grew to care about could see the truth then-- there was still a chance that he'd see it through their eyes one day.]
"A former killer isn't qualified to become a good person."
...is a mindset that I dislike very much.
[But she says something that gets him to drop a soft spoonful of ice cream in his mouth while he hums softly and stares at the softening lump that remains in it's paper cup.]
...what a strange question to ask a Suicide Maniac.
[Yet he laughs; ultimately giving a very serious answer.]
"Life is important"... heh. That's certainly something Odasaku would say. Life itself is both terribly long and terribly short. What time we have is unclear. And it can be both infinitely painful and ultimately rewarding.
What holds value to people is not "life" itself. After all, by itself it's something that is given freely and takes no shape or form-- only reflects countless possibilities. Rather-- it is what one does with that gift that creates it's significance.
But even as someone who seeks my own life's conclusion, there are a lot of lives that I've witnessed that matter. People who have the ability and potential to do great things. But not all lives are equal.
can we just assume everything out of this girl's mouth is a whole series spoiler? that'd be easier
[Then Rean was wrong, and they really never could have brought Crow back, even without Testa-Rossa getting in their way. And that's a reality that Millium refuses to accept.]
...It's not true. It's just not.
[Perhaps that's too simple of an answer to boil it down to, but Millium can't possibly put anything more complicated to words.
Everything Dazai says from that point on is a bit much for her, even, but she just nibbles at her ice cream and listens to him, keeping a level gaze on him.]
So then... what I'm feeling now, I'm supposed to feel this way? ...and then, I should have felt it for Moloch, too. For Mira, for Lovepon. ...and for Crow, more than I did.
[She draws that leg in as close as she can.]
...Am I gonna have to feel like this every time? That's... it's just so much. How do you guys take it?
we sure can
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CW: the suicide talk is back
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cw suicide bc dazai
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